**NOTE TO THE READER: Please forgive my lack of photos on this post, but read on and you’ll understand why.

Today, good news was quickly followed by frightening news. I found out that I got an upgrade on my Air Tran flight from LAX to ATL. Sweet! I’m heading out to Atlanta on business and because of a full flight, ended up getting a corporate upgrade. Being a recent convert to Twitter, I immediately went to “follow” Air Tran to say a public thank you. I searched for their twitter account and one of the first tweets that was returned mentioned a law suit that had been filed against the airline by a couple who was traumatized by cockroaches coming from the air vents on an Air Tran flight to North Carolina. What?? OK – that’s it, game over, flight canceled, I’m staying home where occasionally we have flying roaches, but they never make it to 35,000 feet in an enclosed space. I have to say that the $100,000 lawsuit seemed excessive, but knowing how I react to those abominations of nature, my psychiatric bills may have come to about that amount once I got on the ground.

OK – so the secret is out. My big fear…phobia really, is roaches. And not the little ones that make themselves at home on the North East coast of the States. I’m talking about the ones that should have a leash and a muzzle and frequent more tropical locations. I’d likely be living in the beach towns of Brasil or Viet Nam by now if it weren’t for the looming presence of those damn things….that FLY! How the hell is that fair? I have a friend who is afraid of ants. Now – I won’t criticize anyone’s phobia, but at least ants move in a orderly, straight line and at a regular pace. Roaches – they are fast (and evil) and are all over the place in a matter of seconds. Flying should NOT be an option given to them.

Growing up, I would watch Tom & Jerry cartoons and was always annoyed by the lady of the house (you could only see her from the skirt hem down to her feet) who would jump on a table and scream each time she saw Jerry. That just seemed so stupid and helpless to me. Come on! It is just a mouse…a furry little creature of God. Stop acting like it’s the end of the world. Hmmm – apparently I didn’t know about how hideous roaches were at the time because had I known, I would have had full sympathy for that poor cartoon lady.

I think the fear started some time in High School when I saw a roach nearly drop in Goldie Hawn’s hair in the movie “Bird on a Wire”, but it went into full blown terror in college when a roommate (yes, Kristen, that’s YOU!) bought a large rubber one from the Nature Store and left it on my desk for me to find one afternoon. Ever since then….forget it! I took to wearing handkerchiefs every night in Hoi An, Viet Nam because I saw one flying around and had nightmares one would get stuck in my thick hair. I left an appropriately budgeted guest house in Jericoacoara, Brasil and checked into the most expensive hotel on the beach when a dog sized roach crawled across the room. I’m OUT! A back packer told me a roach crawled up her leg and BIT her in Cambodia…guess who decided to stay in Thailand?? Give me a snake, give me a hairy spider, give me a lion any day over a roach (I can barely continue to type the word).

So, as I type this on my flight to Atlanta with one eye on the air vent above, I wonder if I should take some drastic measures to get over this phobia. Its totally irrational that I’m more apt to alter my travel plans over a bug than over a political action of aggression. And yes!…I do still plan to go to Cambodia (the roach wasn’t the only thing that stopped me). I wonder how hypnosis would work. It would be worth the cost if I could settle down and enjoy the often times beautifully and culturally rich places I stress out in. Or maybe its just a matter of time. I have to admit, that after a few months living in Brasil, I did get a little better. I was never cool with it, but I managed to keep my composure when I sat in someone’s home and there was a large critter on the wall as if it were a work of art (sometimes manners win out over sheer terror). Time, hypnosis, whatever it takes. I can’t let my travel be controlled by something that I can kill with one fast step. But ewww….even the thought of the squish…Never mind! So – what scares you? I confessed….your turn! Leave me a comment below.

OK – I lied…I had to take this picture of the wall paper behind the check in desk at Hotel Indigo. Just proof that God likes to mess with me a little bit.